Don’t Be a Dick at Concerts

Hello everyone,

I’m sorry it’s been awhile. I’ve had couple drafts ready, but I never got around to finishing one until now. This post was supposed to be a review about a couple concerts I went to recently, but the more I kept writing, the more boring they sounded. No one wants to hear me go over every single song, and how great the performance of it was. There’s only so many ways to not make it repetitive. So instead, I’ll talk about some annoying things people do at concerts.

At the end of February, I went to a Banks concert, and this guy kept talking to his friends while the singer was on stage performing. He was trying to talk loud enough so that his friends could hear him over the music. I mean, I get it if someone wants to comment on something that’s happening on stage, but if you want to talk longer than one minute you should probably go somewhere you can actually have a conversation. The rest of us would rather hear the song and not the details of whatever the hell you’re trying to say.

Moreover, in a small venue, the singer can actually hear the murmurs as well. Believe it or not, concert halls are built to carry sound across the room, and it works in both directions. What this means is that if you’re able to make yourself heard over the music, it’s likely that you are disturbing the artist’s performance as well. And while in this case the person talking was shushed pretty fast, I’ve been to a performance where the artist said he would walk off the stage and give an acoustic performance on the street for the people who were actually there to listen to him, if the rest of the audience didn’t stop talking. So in the future, show some respect for the person giving their full on stage, they’re trying to do their job.

Talking, or any other disruption, is my main pet peeve, but there are other smaller issues: If you paid for assigned seating, please sit in the chair that was actually assigned to you. Sure, sometimes the seating blocks are confusing, and it’s very possible to sit in the wrong place if you’re not careful. It’s a mix-up that is easy to unravel and fix. Don’t make a big deal out of it, check your tickets, move and apologize if you’ve made a mistake. On the other hand, if you purposefully stay in the seat that you know you didn’t pay for, because the girl whose seat you’re occupying is okay with sitting on the stairs (probably because she’s a teenager, too shy to stand up to an actual forty-something adult), then you’re being a dick, so just fucking move your ass out. This happened at the Emeli Sandé concert I went to, and the actual adult only moved once one of the stewards said the girl was not allowed to sit on the stairs for security reasons.

My third complaint are phones and cameras. Of course you can take a picture of the artist, or record a part of a song you like as a memory. But please keep it to a maximum of 5 pictures and 2 recordings. The artist is there performing for you. They’re on location to connect to their audience. It’s hard for Bruno Mars to make heart-eyes to your face, when your phone is obstructing his view. I admit I am guilty of taking pictures, but I do put my phone away for most of the performance once I have a decent shot. Furthermore, it’s really fucking annoying to sit or stand behind someone who has his camera up in the air the whole fucking time. Like, excuse me, I’m here to look at Bruno Mars, not a pixelated image of Bruno Mars on your screen. Additionally, if he asks you to put away your phone, for fuck’s sake put that damn phone away, he’s only asking for this one song, even though he’d probably prefer it if you didn’t record his whole concert.

I want to end this post with something that happened to my friend, and me–but she had the worst of it–at an Emeli Sandé concert last March. We were sitting next to two girls, they were on my friend’s side. They entered the row audibly, which is okay, they were having fun. The first thing one of the girls said to us was that her friend was going to be screaming loudly, which again was nothing out of the ordinary. The frustrating part comes in where they were buzzed and smelled of alcohol when they arrived. The girl sitting next to my friend took it upon herself to turn my introverted friend into an extrovert. Trying to coax her into yelling, and singing, and dancing. To not give a fuck, and scream when everyone else was quiet. At one point, she said my friend was beautiful, which is cool, it’s a compliment. But it turned to where she might have been hitting on my friend who was clearly not interested, and only there to listen to the music. My friend even missed her favorite song, because the girl next to her wouldn’t stop talking to her. At one point the girl even cried, supposedly out of pity, which is incredibly disrespectful, and fuck her for making my friend feel bad. Some people are quiet, and don’t mind silence, deal with it. Not everyone has a loud personality. The only thing she accomplished was stressing her the fuck out, and making her uncomfortable. Overall making the experience less amazing, while it should have been epic!

Basically, what to take away from this post is, show some fucking respect to the artist on stage, and the person in the audience next to you. It’s called common decency.

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Emeli Sandé – Long Live The Angels Tour

Introduction

Hi!

My name is Valerie.

I started this blog, because I always liked the idea of having a blog. An online journal. So, I finally stopped finding excuses as to why not and I went for it. That being said, I’m not sure how often I’ll update this blog. I would like to say once a week, or once every two weeks, but I know myself, and I am the worst kind of procrastinator, which is why I can’t make any promises.

Content-wise, this blog will be about anything that inspires me in the moment, whether that’s a book I’ve read recently, a newly published album by a favorite artist, or just something that happened to me personally… We’ll see how it goes. I don’t want to commit to one thing, and then be stuck in that box forever. I have a hard time making decisions as it is, and I don’t want to restrict myself.

The title of my blog, Kindness Is Optional, in real life I’m known to be a kind person (if I say so myself). But I do believe that one of the most important things in life is to be kind to each other, to a stranger, to a friend, or to your family. I was especially inspired by the quote Noora had on her wall in the Norwegian Series Skam:

“Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.”

And that is exactly how I want to live my life, because it’s true. At any given moment in time you do not know what someone is going through, and they don’t know how bad your day is going, so give each other a break once in a while. However, and this is why I went with kindness is optional, it’s okay to put yourself first. If being kind means you have to scrub away at a part of yourself, it’s not worth it. Stand up for what you believe in, be true to yourself. That’s what this blog is for me. What I write here will come from my heart. My soul will speak through my words. I won’t always be kind, but I will be honest.

That’s it for now!

Lots of love,
Val!